


Always be Yourself (Unless you can be a Dragon)

by RileeTheRiddler



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Dragons, M/M, dragon!eggsy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-01-29
Packaged: 2019-03-11 04:44:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13516821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RileeTheRiddler/pseuds/RileeTheRiddler
Summary: Eggsy is the giant golden dragon who steals the Crown Jewels. Harry Hart is the poor, unfortunate soul sent to retrieve them. It was a match made in heaven (or hell, considering Galahad is sure he is going to die by incineration)





	Always be Yourself (Unless you can be a Dragon)

**Author's Note:**

> I love this so much.

Galahad’s steady breathing was inaudible in the dimly lit chamber. He had been in the business too long to let something like breathing give him away. His steps were silent as he crept from one shadow to the next.

This is the most dangerous mission he has ever been assigned. He wants to curse Arthur for sending him on this fool’s errand. This impossible task.  If he didn’t know any better, he would say the old man was trying to get rid of him.

But he did know better. Arthur couldn’t afford to lose him. Not to sound egotistical, but Galahad was the most valuable agent Kingsman had.

This mission was just something that was so seemingly impossible that Arthur had no choice but to throw the agent with the biggest chance of success at it.

Galahad would be flattered if he wasn’t ninety-eight percent sure he was going to die a fiery, painful death by incineration.

Or maybe he would be eaten. You never knew with a dragon.

+++

The theft of the Crown Jewels was kept quiet. The UK simply couldn’t afford to let a mistake like that get out. The political climate was too tense. The international community was ready to jump down their throats for the slightest mistake. Everyone was calling their competency into question due to issues with the European Union and the constant threat of bombings. Something like this, the theft of these symbols of power and history, would not help the situation. Immediately, they set to investigating the crime.

Meanwhile, fakes were set out in the Tower of London to fool tourist and prevent word from reaching the media.

It must have been an inside job, they said. The head of security even now sat in an MI6 interrogation cell. There is no way a common criminal could have filched the jewels with no one the wiser until the next morning.

The cameras, when they pulled up the surveillance footage, were missing an hour of footage from two to three in the morning. The guards responsible for patrolling during that time were pulled into the MI6 investigation cell alongside their boss. The agent in charge at MI6 quietly had all the remaining guards called into the station. They would get to the bottom of this, no matter what.

Unfortunately, an intrepid young antiquarian who was studying archeology at the Imperial College London was visiting the Tower of London museum that day. Her unique skill set leads her to immediately spot the inconstancies in the Crown Jewels of the United Kingdom. After all, there were over 140 artifacts that had been replaced with fakes. She left the museum fuming at the deception. She was furious at not only the gall of the museum to present them with what were clearly fakes but also the blatant extortion of the thousands of people who visited the museum every day. Immediately, she went home and wrote a scathing article on her blog. One of her many followers happened to be an aspiring journalist who quickly picked up the story.

Less than forty-eight hours after the jewels had been stolen, despite MI6’s efforts to the contrary, every news outlet in England was reporting the shocking news.

_“Crown Jewels FAKE! Exploitation and Incompetence!!”_

It wasn’t long before other news outlets around the world picked up the story.

It was at that point the queen demanded the Kingsman.

+++

Merlin tracked the Crown Jewels down in less than an hour. Such valuable and important pieces of history had long been fitted with trackers. It was a simple matter to tap into the right frequency and pinpoint the GPS coordinates. Merlin wasn’t surprised MI6 never realized how easy it was. Often, he was surprised the other organization got anything done at all. In fact, he was pretty sure they were still interrogating the guards on suspicions of an inside job, despite all evidence to the contrary.  Amateurs.

The result of the GPS tracker was troubling, however. It was transmitting from the Scottish Highlands. From what the satellite imagery was showing, it looked like an ancient castle set upon an island in the middle of a glistening lake.

It was a beautiful place, if Merlin were into nature or green, living things at all, then he would want to go. But he wasn’t. He found comfort in the cold, analytical glow of his computers. Besides, he would have to be an idiot not the recognize that particular region of the world as one of the last strongholds of the Greater Welsh Dragons.

Merlin’s brow furrowed, and his lips turned down into a frown as the realization hit him. _‘Shit, a dragon’s gone and stolen the jewels’._

+++

Eggsy was quite content at the moment. He rolled around in the ancient pile of gold he had inherited from his dear old dad and congratulated himself for having added to his hoard. The gleaming jewels on his new scepter sparkled prettily from the moonlight spilling in through the window of his castle.

He loved being a dragon, but as he gazed at his new crown he thought about becoming human sized for a moment, so he could deck himself out in it. Eggsy did take pride in being one of the most fashionable dragons in the Scottish Highlands after all. He debated briefly with himself over the merits of the gleaming golden crown or the shiny silver one.

It was but a passing thought, however. He still remembered how heavy everything had been when he was human shaped and acquiring his new pieces. The bag he had stuffed everything in for transport had nearly ripped when he was making his way out of the human city.

Besides, Eggsy didn’t really fancy the idea of being human sized right now. He just wanted to roll around and luxuriate in his shiny hoard. His mum and little flower of a sister were to visit soon, he needed to rest now to have the energy for guest later. He missed them so much, but he would never admit to being lonely out here in his cold drafty castle. He had his gold and his jewels and that was enough.

With that thought, Eggsy the Dragon burrowed himself into his hoard and settled in for a nap.

+++

Galahad was dropped off by helicopter ten miles from the dragon’s castle. He was to make his way there by an all-terrain vehicle borrowed from a local village, but he would have to walk the last mile and then take an inflatable raft to the island. Dragons were notorious for their good hearing and Galahad did not want to chance letting the dragon know he was coming. He had a large, heavy-duty bag to place the artifacts in once he retrieved them, but the spy did not think he would need it.

He had updated his Last Will and Testament before he left, leaving all his worldly possessions to Merlin and his remaining fortune to Kingsman. He was tempted to leave Mr. Pickles to Arthur, as a final fuck you, but he cared too much about the stuffed animal to leave it to such a dreary fate.

Galahad had accepted his fate. The chance he would make it out of this were slim. He would still do his best, of course, but he was a realist. Nobody survived stealing from a dragon’s hoard.

By the time he was sneaking through the castle halls, he had already reminisced about his life. He had startlingly few regrets. Perhaps the most obvious one was the fact that no one besides Merlin would miss him once he got incinerated. That thought put a slight ache in his chest.

Too late now to worry about his lack of interpersonal relationships though.

The castle was drafty and ominous. Every time he darted from a shadow, Galahad could swear he felt the eyes of the dead upon him. Merlin was quiet in his ear. Perhaps, the silence was the tech wizard’s way of a communicating a solemn respect for the last mission and probable death of his long-time colleague.  Or he was on mute.

Probably on mute, knowing his friend’s ruthless pragmatism.

Galahad finally reached the area with the greatest probability of holding the dragon’s hoard based on satellite imagery and paused to take a deep breath. He held it for a second before letting is out in a silent gust. Showtime.

+++

Eggsy knew someone was here the moment they stepped foot on his island. Strange footsteps echoed to his sensitive ears, as the human stepped on the shore and then through his castle. Slowly, the human made their way closer to him.

The dragon was surprised. He thought humans had moved passed the stage where they foolishly tried to steal from his kind. Apparently not.

_‘Hmm, this could be fun.’_ He thought. It had been a while since he had visitors. He stayed buried under the gold, out of sight, and stretched his senses to observe this foolish human. Let the human approach, let him grow confident, and then when the human least expected it, Eggsy would viciously emerge from his hoard and scare the shit out of him.

And them Eggsy might eat him. He was feeling a bit peckish after all.

+++  
Galahad’s blood raced through his veins as his heart beat faster than it had in years, flushing his cheeks and filling his body with adrenaline. Still, his steps were quiet and his breathing even. He was a professional.

The dragon’s hoard filled his vision and Galahad, familiar with the modern-day trappings of wealth like stock, Bentleys, and property, was awed at the mountains of glittering gold and polished jewels. He had not put much thought into what a dragon’s hoard would look like, having been raised like every child on the legends of them and therefore expecting something similar to what he was seeing. But the sheer scale of it was stupefying.

Still, Galahad was a professional and he made all these observations while slinking through the shadows around the edges of the cavernous hall, his brown eyes relentlessly scanning the shimmering treasures looking for his targets. There was one fact that did not escape his notice.

He could not see the dragon.

What did that mean? Was it gone? Off plundering the crown jewels of some other monarchy? Galahad did not believe he would be lucky enough to catch the dragon while he was out, and the uncertainty put him on edge.

Well, more on edge.

Galahad had experienced his fair share of luck throughout his long and lustrous career, both good and bad but he had not made it this long without being cautious.

He raised his left hand and tapped it against his glasses to activate the heat sensors. The gold and silver lit up before him in a mass of cold blue and black. Blazing like the sun in the center of the hoard was a huge dragon-shaped red mass. The Kingsman agent felt his pulse racket to a truly unhealthy rate.

His breath caught in his lungs and he only realized he was holding it when his lungs started to burn in disagreement.

God, he wished Merlin was talking to him through the feed in his glasses, he needed his friend's sardonic humor to normalize the mission before he went crazy. Sadly, his earpiece remained quiet.

Galahad tracked the burning mass of red with his glasses. The dragon looked to be roughly the size of a five-story building. It was hard to tell for sure because the reptile was curled up, apparently asleep.

Out of the corner of his eye, Galahad spotted a flash of muted purple. He turned his head slightly, keeping the mass of the dragon in the corner of his eye and spotted what had to be St. Edward’s crown. Surrounding it was a mass of other objects that had to be the crown jewels.

The spy’s mind worked at the speed of light. The task no longer seemed insurmountable. The dragon was asleep, and the jewels were right there, he might get out of this alive.

He would have to climb up the unstable pile of gold to get to the prize, however, potentially risking an avalanche of precious metals that would surely wake the dragon. Then he would have to stuff what he could in his specially made bag. Then he would have to climb back down to make his escape.

Galahad calculated his chances of success at slightly more than twelve percent.

His eyes hard but heart still beating rapidly, Galahad straightened and moved from his shadow to the pile of gold with the crown jewels. Thankfully, the dragon was asleep in the pile directly next to the crown jewels pile, so Galahad did not have to risk scaling an unstable pile of precious metals thinly covering a vicious, fire-breathing, man-eating beast.

Small mercies.

Large rubies and golden coins littered the floor, gradually increasing in size and quantity the closer Galahad got. Finally, he reached the point where he could no longer avoid stepping on them, he tried to be a silent as possible, but every once in a while, the gold coins would clink and chime as they were shuffled about and hit each other. Every time they did, Galahad would freeze and hold his position for a full minute, anxiety and trepidation coursing through his veins before slowly moving forward and up.

Every minute he spends climbing, he could feel his chances of success slipping lower and lower. He did not think about Kingsman, or bloody Arthur, or even Merlin. There was only room in his thoughts for shoving the absolute terror down and placing one foot in front of the other.

Finally, after a climb that feels like it was longer than Galahad’s entire life up until the point, the Kingsman agent reached the crown.

There is a moment of absolute stillness, and incredulous disbelief, of thinking _‘I really made it’_ , and then the gold pile next to Galahad’s shifts and he stops breathing entirely.

The sound of a thousand golden coins shifting and falling to the floor in an avalanche of noise fills the room. The clanking and chiming as precious metals and rocks and coins descend from the top and drop to the cold stone of the castle’s floors.

Slowly, a golden snout emerges from the depths, followed by a long neck and then black feet adorned with razor sharp claws slam down on either side of Galahad, destabilizing his pile of gold and sending him to his knees.  Deceptively thin looking wings block the moonlight from the window and throw the whole room into shadow. Gold and silver continue to rain down around him, and he is terrified to find that he has become ensnared in the pile, pinned in place like a butterfly by a giant golden bowl and what looks like a silver candelabra. The weight of the precious metal ensuring no avenue of a quick or easy escape.

A low growling sound has filled the room, the dragon now fully emerged, his tail swinging menacingly through the air, his giant bulging winged arms clamped down around Galahad, encasing him in a prison. Or should he say, executioners block.

Galahad looks up, he doesn’t want to, but he will be damned if he doesn’t look his murderer in the face before he dies. He traces a scaly, golden torso towards a powerful, never-ending neck, up towards the underside of the dragon’s chin, over fierce and gleaming white fangs, ridged nostrils and finally icy blue-grey slit pupils glaring down at him.

That menacing head slowly lowers until it is less than a meter from Galahad. The agent is still frozen, fear and an ancient sense of self-preservation keeping him motionless.

A gust of hot, sulphuric breath ghost across his skin as the dragon opens its gaping maw to no doubt devour Galahad in one bite.

“Well, what do we have here?” is what he hears instead. The deep, gravelly voice ensnaring his senses.

“A thief?” The dragon continues. Slowly winding his long shimmering body around Galahad, ensuring escape is well and truly impossible. “I thought humans were smarter than that nowadays.”

The hoard tinkles and chimes as its master slowly settles back down, fully encircling the human who dared to intrude. 

Galahad is so fucked.

“What’s your name then? I can’t just call you thief. It’s rude, ya know?” the dragon continues, slightly menacing, “even if that’s what you are. Slinking in the middle of the night like some klepto. Not even doing a very good job of it, are ya?”

Galahad would be offended if his blood wasn’t pumping adrenaline through his veins at precisely the speed of sound. He opened his mouth to reply but found that he couldn’t speak.

The dragon notices and _snickered_ of all things, “Cat got your tongue, Mr. Cat Burglar?”

Galahad scowled and cleared his threat. “Galahad.” He croaked out in a voice not near as strong as he had intended. “My name is Galahad.”

The dragon huffed. “Lies. That’s not the name your bearer gave you. You can’t lie to a dragon; didn’t you know that? Not very smart are you.”

Galahad swallowed. He didn’t particularly want to tell the giant, man-eating dragon his name. Perhaps the reptile could sense this, because he brought his snout closer to the human and cajoled, “come on, if you tell me, I won’t eat you.”

_‘How very reassuring.’_ Galahad thought. He cleared his throat again; his heart was slowing gradually the longer the dragon went without roasting him alive. “My mother named me Harry Hart.”

“Harry Hart,” the dragon drawled. “Haaarry Haaarrtt.” He repeated, elongating the vowels and caressing Galahads name in a strange reptilian accent. “I like it. Flows very nicely.”

Galahad coughed, “Thank you.” Might as well be polite, a gentleman was always well-manned after all, even in the face of certain death.

“Eggsy.” The dragon suddenly spoke.

“Excuse me?”

“That’s me name, innit? Eggsy.”

Galahad had another moment of disbelief. Was he really going to die at the claws of a dragon named Eggsy? That wasn’t an intimidating name in the least. It sounded more like a breakfast food for goodness sake.

Nonetheless, Harry wasn’t trying to get killed any sooner, so he simply nodded and said, “it is nice to meet you, Eggsy.”

The dragon stared at him for a moment before snickering again. “You’re a freak, aren’t you?”

Now, Galahad was offended. “I beg your pardon?”

The dragon was full on chuckling, “All polite and whatnot. Aren’t you humans supposed to be running and begging for your little lives right now?”

“Yes, well, I do not see much point in begging. You are probably going to kill me regardless.”

The dragon stopped its childish chuckling and turned to stare at Galahad. The intensity of those icy blue slits pierced Galahad to his core. The dragon hummed, “yeah, probably.”

Silence descended for a moment. The dragon seemingly thinking and Galahad trying to surreptitiously free himself from the silver candelabra trapping his legs.  What he wouldn’t give for a laser at the moment.

“But you know, I have been awfully bored lately.” The dragon suddenly began, gaze moving back to the agent who immediately froze. “And I confess, I was going to eat you. But...” the dragon trailed off.

“But...?” Galahad prompted, morbidly interested in the dragon's plans for what was no doubt going to be his painful death.

“Hmmm, how about a deal instead?” the dragon queried.

“A deal?” Galahad repeated incredulously.

“Yeah,” Eggsy confirmed cheerfully.

“…. What kind of deal?” The agent cautiously questioned.

“Well, how about you stay here forever and be my pet and I don’t eat you?”

Galahad hoped his silence spoke volumes about what he thought about that. However, the dragon didn’t seem the get the clue and suddenly started to move about the cavernous hall. “Isn’t it the best idea, ever? You can sleep on that pile over there because I sleep in the one next to it and I can bring you deer to eat and you can tell me stories about what you humans get up to every day. It’s awfully lonely being a dragon, ya know? Like, me mum visits sometimes with me sister, but not enough. And I hate visiting them because that awful new dickhead she’s shacked up with. He don’t even have a good hoard! Mine is ten times better. I don’t see why mum and Daisy don’t just live with me, but what can you do, ya know? So, what do you say? Want to be my pet?”

Galahad did not know how to say no to a dragon without getting roasted alive, but he thinks he would prefer to be dead than to prisoner of a dragon for the rest of his miserable life. “I’m afraid, as lovely as that sounds, I have other obligations.”

Eggsy huffed, “Well you can’t fulfill those obligations if you’re dead.”

The dragon had a point, Harry reluctantly admitted.

“Besides, I will take you on walks and groom you and train you. It’ll be fun! What do you say?” The dragon is almost whining now, the deep baritone it started out with all but gone to reveal a higher pitched enthusiasm. Galahad had the sudden thought that this dragon might not be fully grown yet. 

“I say that sounds absolutely horrific,” Galahad says. It escapes his mouth before he can stop it, and the second the last syllable leaves his lips, he can feel his heart stopping again. _‘Am I trying to die?’_

Eggsy growls lowly for a moment and stops his restlessness. “Ugh,” he grunts, like a spoiled child before flopping down onto his side, pouting something fierce.  “Fine.” A moment, “I guess I have to eat you then.”

_‘Let’s not be drastic’_ Harry thinks, but what he says is, “I don’t taste very good, I’m afraid.”

Eggsy slants a curious look at him, “Really?” he asks skeptically.

“Really,” Harry confirms. “Occupational hazard, unfortunately. I have ingested many poisons over the course of my life, to make myself immune to them. I will most likely upset your stomach.” _‘Technically not a lie’_

“Gross,” the dragons stuck out his tongue in disgust and for a moment Galahad is struck by how human the giant reptile acts. “But wait do you mean by occupational hazard? Aren’t you a thief?”

“Of course not,” Galahad responds.

“But you was coming to steal my treasures, weren’t you?” The dragon seems skeptical.

“No. I was coming to retrieve the treasure you stole.” Galahad can’t believe he is having this conversation.

“You mean all the pretties you had locked up in that tower in your big little human city? Those are mine now. Finders keepers and all.” The dragon seems to be quickly losing interest in the conversation, sensing this Harry tries to engage him more, after all, every second spent talking is a second more he can spend on trying to get free and escape.

“How did you steal them all by the way? No one saw you, and I am quite sure you are not easy to miss.”

The dragon looked to be preening under the implied praise. “Yeah, I am pretty good at sneaking.” Eggsy’s chest puffed up for a moment. “Wasn’t hard at all. I just got all human shaped and waltzed right in. Of course, I had to use a bit of magic on the invisible eyes in the walls. Right creepy, that. Don’t you get freaked with all those eyes watching your every move?”

“It was quite clever of you,” Harry complimented. Never let it be said he did not know how too butter up a target. “But, what do you mean by human-shaped?”

“Ya know,” the dragon explained, “shaped like a human?”

_‘Thank you ever so much for that truly eloquent explanation.’_ “So, you can make your self look like a human?”

“Sure,” Eggsy agrees. “Don’t do it much, it’s a right pain to squish all my bits and pieces into something so tiny. And you humans are sooooo tiny. Why can’t you be bigger?” The dragon laments.

Galahad feels a bit like he has been transported to a different universe. _‘How is this my life?’_

The, something the dragon said jumped out at him _. ‘Eyes in the wall? The dragon can disable cameras?’_

“So, you took out the cameras when you stole the Jewels?’ Harry asks, just to confirm his suspicions.

“Sure did,” Eggsy grins, suddenly menacing. “And I took out the little eyes in your glasses the second you stepped on my island.”

_‘Shit’_ Harry realizes _. ‘I was made before I even had a chance.’_

Eggsy seems to read the realization on Galahad’s face for what it is because the dragon suddenly begins cackling. “Bruv, you should have seen your face when I came out of my hoard. Scared the shit out of you, yeah?” The dragon’s laughter fills the air and echoes through the chamber.

Harry is fucking done. Especially with this piece of shit dragon who gets his rocks off at toying with poor humans. Also, this is why fucking Merlin has been so quiet. He probably thinks Harry is already dead, gone the moment the feed cut off and Harry stepped foot on this godforsaken island.

Galahad glares at the dragon as its laughter dies down. It takes a while, and Harry fumes the whole time. He did not like this situation one bit.

Finally, the dragon composes itself. “Bruv, I am going to remember that fondly for a long, long time.”

“I am so glad to provide entertainment for you,” Galahad drawls sarcastically, beyond caring if he offends the dragon or not.

“Aww don’t be like that. It was just a bit of fun, innit?” If Eggsy starts pouting again, Galahad is going to take his gun and fucking shoot himself to get away from this ridiculous.

“Honestly, Eggsy. I am quite tired. I want nothing more than to go home and have a nice long bath. But I can’t because I have to retrieve the jewels you stole, or my boss will never let me live it down. Not that I’m going to live it down anyway…” he mumbles the last part under his breath. He is so done.  

Oddly, the dragon began to look guilty of all things. Obviously upset at causing the tiny human distress. “Hey now, don’t get upset. I didn’t mean no harm or nothing.”

“Yes, well, I doubt my poor heart can take much more of this.”

“Don’t be like that,” Eggsy _fucking_ pouts.

Galahad levels a flat stare at the giant beast.

Eggsy sheepishly bowed his head before blatantly changing the subject. “Your boss huh? He wants MY Jewels and he sent you instead of coming himself?” the dragon questioned.

“Yes,” Galahad confirmed.

“That seems shitty. Doesn’t he know dragons kill people who steal from their hoards?”

“Presumably, that’s why he didn’t come himself.”

“Hmmm,” Eggsy thought. “How about this, as an apology for scaring you and all, why don’t I go to your boss and explain to him why he can’t have my Jewels back? That way you don’t have to get in trouble or nothing.”

Galahad is having a challenging time following the dragon’s logic. “… and then you’ll just…let me go?” he questions.

Eggsy frowns, his bottom fangs jutting out slightly. “Maybe.” He conceded. “Ask me later.”

Galahad frowns. He doesn’t really have any other options, but he doesn’t particularly want to lead a fire-breathing dragon to Kingsman HQ. He is in the middle of weighing his life against Arthur’s when the dragon speaks again.

“Its decided.” He nods. “You can’t have my jewels. I can explain this to your boss. Then you will come back here with me. We have to be quick though, Mum and Daisy flower are visiting next week. She’s going to love my new crowns.”

With that, the dragon raises from his slouched position and turns towards Harry. He extends a razor-sharp claw towards Galahad and lifts the candelabra and giant bowl off his legs. In the next seconds, the golden covered ground in rapidly fading into the distance as Eggsy lifts Harry in the air.

“You can ride on my back, yeah? Your little tiny legs could never keep up with mine.” And then Harry is gracefully lower onto the ridges that cover the golden dragons long, muscular back. The scales are almost uncomfortably hot. Eggsy starts towards the giant entrance immediately, his giant legs lumbering gracefully and long tail swinging behind him. Galahad grunts with every step, the motion jarring and rough.

Once outside, Eggsy paused for a minute to sniff the air. “You came from that way, yeah?” he asks with his snout pointed toward the south. “Hold on tight, I’ve never flown with a human before. It would be a shame if you fell off.”

“Wait!! Wait!” Galahad yells, only just recovering from the jarring walk outside, “I can’t fly!!”

Eggsy twists his long neck until his head is looking at Galahad, “Of course you can’t Harry, you don’t have wings.”

“No, I mean, “Galahad faltered, trying to come up with something that’s not a lie that will end up with him safe on the ground and not flying towards his death after falling from the back of a dragon. “if humans fly without the proper equipment, then they freeze to death and die.”

“Really?” Eggsy wondered. “I didn’t know that. I should’ve guessed though, you tiny humans are so weak and all.”

“Exactly,” Harry confirmed. “I’m afraid I’ll have to take my boat.”

“I’ve never been on a boat before,” Eggsy admitted.

“You won’t fit on mine.” Harry cautioned.

“Sure, I can!” Eggsy gushed. “I just have to get all human-sized first.” And then, before Harry could stop him, Golden scales began to shimmer, and bones began to creak. The sight of muscles rippling underneath and an impossible mass shrinking into a physically impossible shape would haunt Harry’s nightmares. It was impressive but grotesque and unnatural. Less than a minute later, and Galahad was staring at a pale skinned, blonde haired, human-shaped dragon.

“Does that hurt?” is all the spy can ask.

“Ahh, you get used to it.” Eggsy waves him off. The dragon’s voice sounded almost like a normal human but for the gravely undertone. His ears were pointed and there was a glimmer of golden scales on his elbows and knees, only noticeable because Harry was looking. Also, apparently a natural blonde by the state of his abdominal hair. He was also naked. And surprisingly fit

“That is quite the transformation,” Harry notes, still a bit shell-shocked.

“Yeah,” Eggsy preens, “I’ve always been gifted at it. Probably could’ve lived as a human if I’d wanted to.”

_‘I highly doubt that’_ Harry thinks. “Is that common for dragons, then. To live as humans?”

Eggsy hummed, “Sometimes. If you don’t mind being so squished all the time.”

“Ah.”

“Now, where’s that boat of yours?”

++++

**Author's Note:**

> lols


End file.
